Saturday, 1 November 2014

The Page That Loves A Grapple

Manuel Pellegrini is facing a crisis that's not as bad as last year's crisis, Robbie Savage wants to stand by the predictions that were over-rided by the other predictions...


Written Off
The spotlight is very much on the terrible form of Manchester City in Friday's newspapers, with The Sun (amongst others) hammering the 'Deja Blue' line about City's title defence being even worse than two years ago.

'They actually had four points more at the end of October 2012 than they do now,' writes Martin Blackburn above a graphic showing that City indeed had 21 points from nine games in 2012 and they have just 17 points today.

What the graphic doesn't show and Blackburn doesn't mention: They had 16 points from nine games last season when, you know, they went on to win the Premier League title. So maybe, just maybe, drawing conclusions in October is a tad foolish.


Deja Blue Again
Quite how 'boss Pellegrini battles to keep title fight alive' with a points total higher than the same stage last season is not made clear by the Daily Mirror.

'This weekend, Chelsea could be nine points clear of City,' writes David Anderson as he ponders a 'nightmare' and 'the biggest crisis' of Manuel Pellegrini's reign.

And this time last year, Arsenal could have gone nine points clear of City; they didn't because Manchester City hammered Norwich 7-0 on their way to the Premier League title.


Six-Pointer
"In my time, we used to go there and say to ourselves 'it's six points a season'," says Andy Cole in the Daily Mirror as derby day approaches.

Number of league games between United and City during Andy Cole's seven years at the club: Five.


Desperate Back Page Of The Day
From the Daily Mail's 'DRONE ALERT!' story: 'POLICE are on red alert amid fears supporters will disrupt Sunday's Manchester derby by flying drones into the Etihad Stadium. Suspicions have been raised that fans will use drones to fly messages into the ground...'

And suspicions have been raised that the Daily Mail did not have a back page until Jack Gaughan came up with this crock of sh*t at roughly 8.25 on Thursday night.


Fairy Garden
The Sun's Chief Grumpypants Steven Howard has previously written that Louis van Gaal is 'away with the fairies' so he is in no mood to give Manchester United credit for a home draw with Chelsea.

'They still required a 94th-minute Robin van Persie equaliser against a team without Diego Costa, Loic Remy and Ramires,' writes an incredulous Howard.

You couldn't beat a Chelsea side without their third-choice central midfielder? They only had Nemanja Matic and Cesc Fabregas and you still couldn't win? Now that's sodding embarrassing.

United players missing on Sunday: Jonny Evans, Phil Jones, Michael Carrick, Antonio Valencia, Wayne Rooney and Radamel Falcao.


INSIGHT
They're the 'talk of football' so it's to The Sun's columnists Alan Shearer and Ian Wright that Mediawatch turns for the low-down ahead of Sunday's Manchester derby. Who better to answer all the big questions but two former footballers with no connection to either team and little to no managerial experience?

To save you the subscription fee, we bring you the salient points from the big preview...

Why have City collapsed in the last three games?
AS: 'Hunger...who wants it more...not just about turning up.'
IW: 'Attitude...hunger...wanted it more...bodies on the line.'

'Robin Van Persie looked rejuvenated...is he still United's key player up front?
AS: Not really (we're paraphrasing here).
IW: 'He is still THE main man.'

Rooney...scissor-kick...too wound up...blah blah
AS: 'I believe he is mature enough to make sure he doesn't get too wound up.'
IW: 'The one thing you can guarantee with Wayne is that he is more than capable of coming up with the big goal on the big occasion.'

(NB: Rooney has scored against one top-half side - West Ham - in the whole of 2014).

Sergio Aguero...is he the Premier League's top finisher?
AS: Doesn't really answer the question but 'back to his best he will terrorise a shaky Manchester United backline'.
IW: 'He's EVERY defence's worst nightmare.'

Is Angel Di Maria Sunday's potential matchwinner?
AS: 'He can be a matchwinner.'
IW: 'Di Maria IS a matchwinner, simple as that.'

What's up with Yaya Toure?
AS: 'He has just not looked happy.'
IW: 'Don't rule him out having a huge say on Sunday.'

And that, people, is the 'talk of football'.


Cutting Political Teeth
"I can't believe it, but that's politics in football isn't it?" - Steven Gerrard on Luis Suarez's omission from the Ballon d'Or nominees list.

No Steven, that's biting in football.


Standing By
Robbie Savage on Aston Villa, August 15, Daily Mirror: 'Sorry, but I think they are going to struggle. The owner wants out and new signings Cole, Richardson and Senderos are not going to pull up any trees. Roy Keane will be a positive influence as manager Paul Lambert's No.2 but it could be a close call with relegation.'

Robbie Savage predicts a 15th-place finish for Aston Villa, September 4, Daily Mirror: 'I will NOT be changing my mind on the major issues at both ends of the table. This is how I think the Premier League will look next May, and I will stand or fall by these predictions.'

Robbie Savage on Aston Villa, October 31, Daily Mirror: 'Before a ball was kicked. I predicted that Villa would struggle this season, although I said they would NOT go down. A month into the season, after they won at Liverpool, I upgraded my forecast towards a comfortable mid-table finish...I'm afraid we are back to where we were in August, and I stand by my original forecast.'

The Savage guide to punditry: Make a whole host of contrasting predictions. And then stand by the one that comes true. Until it doesn't.


Hotel.com
Daily Mail, March 6: 'With Brazil hosting the World Cup this June and July, it is no surprise that Beckham is in town for the country's most important annual event. And with the footballing legend reportedly staying at the Fasano hotel on Ipanema Beach - the most stylish address in the city - MailOnline Travel takes a peek inside the city's top design hotel.'

Daily Mail, May 19: 'After arriving at the airport to a bevvy of female fans, David Beckham - who carried all his own luggage - retreated to the Fasano hotel in Ipanema Beach, known as the most stylish hotel in Rio.'

Daily Mail, June 17, in an article including 11 photographs of the Fasano hotel: 'In Brazil to support her husband and the England team, Coleen Rooney has just checked in to Rio de Janeiro's Fasano hotel with her family. Set on stylish Ipanema Beach, the £700-a-night hotel rubs shoulders with some of the most exclusive shops and boutiques in the city and has become something of a celebrity favourite.'

Daily Mail, June 17: 'Looking tired she carried her four-year-old son Kai into the Fasano luxury hotel which overlooks Ipanema beach...'

Charlie Sale, Daily Mail, June 18: 'The super friendly Brazilian welcome for the Rooney family at the Fasano Hotel on Ipanema Beach includes staff putting a tepee-style tent in their room plus cuddly toys, chocolates and Brazil shirts for children Kai and Klay.'

Daily Mail, September 1: 'Continuing our series on the world's hippest hotels and the stars who frequent them, Sarah Turner checks out the Fasano in Rio de Janeiro...'

Neil Ashton, Daily Mail, October 31: 'Sipping cappuccinos by the pool of the striking Fasano hotel in Rio de Janeiro last summer, Rio Ferdinand couldn't wait to get back to work...'

Mediawatch just hopes that Sale and Ashton didn't have to share a twin room.


His Name Is Rio...
It is from Ashton that we learn that Ferdinand 'deserves a better swansong' than being in a relegation battle with QPR and getting banned by the FA for a 'yo mamma' tweet. Neither of which are remotely his fault, of course. Poor Rio. 

But there are always silver linings - at least he got to sip cappuccinos by the pool of the striking Fasano hotel. We hear it's wonderful.


Quote Of The Day
"I've never read it. I don't know where you get it from. Every day someone has got something to say on Twitter. I don't understand. It would be easier - it would save all the hassle - if no one was on Twitter" - Harry Redknapp, just over a year after the famous #askHarry Q&A on the mysterious Twitter.


Worst Headline Of The Day
'SAMTA CLAUS' - The Daily Mirror.


Non-Football Story Of The Day
'A woman at a German pharmacy squirted breastmilk at a store clerk to distract staff as she stole from the cash register, police say. The woman, between the ages of 35 and 40, entered a pharmacy in Darmstadt, located 30 km south of Frankfurt, on Monday and said she was interested in purchasing a breast pump, the Darmstadt News reported. When she went to pay for the pump, she exposed a breast and used her hand to squirt milk at the clerk. She continued to spray milk on the counter, and approached a second cash register, police said' - Toronto Sun.




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